Delayed Marriages: Bitter Fruits Plucked from the Western Orchards A marriage delayed is Peace, Affection and Mercy denied.
The evidence is in the verse 31,of Surah Rum : And among his signs is that He created mates for you from you, and in them you find solace , and He made affection and mercy between you. In this are signs for people who are intelligent
“ how many marriages do you manage to fix up every year”? I had asked this question to a matrimonial center few years back. “ We have over 500 bio datas but manage to get only 12- 15 people get married”. I thought that his organization was inefficient in fixing marriages, so I cross checked it with a few other centers but the statistics seemed parallel. It’s a truth that the Muslims have started delaying the marriages of young men and women not realizing the harm that it is causing to the community and their deen
If some one wants to gauge the results of delayed marriages then let him study the scattered family life of the West. The Marriages there face stiff competition from legalized gayism, lesbianism, live in relations, open affairs………
An average Muslim youth may not go into these sins due to the social bonds that they enjoy, but there are other equally dangerous secret sinful options due to the suppression of sexual desires. If sexual urge is not addressed at the right age and the right way then, there are ways which offers shameless refuge to the youth. This gives rise to porn watching, fantasy sex, masturbation, visiting prostitutes and other secret acts that damage the mental health of a large number of youth.
Islam has protected modesty through halal options. The right age of marriage in the Islamic law is the age of puberty, but in a Non Muslim country like India where the law permits you to get married at the age of 21 if you are a boy and 18 if you are a girl then why prevent the young people from getting married by frightening them from questions like” how will you focus on your career?” or “what will you feed?” “are you standing on your feet?” The Non Muslim Gujarati Community gets their boys married by the time they are twenty two, so that by the time this young men finish their graduation and take up the reins of their father’s business or a job their father is still young around 50 and he joins a charitable organization and gives time for the community service. There are no less then hundred such centers superbly run by the Gujarati community’s middle aged young men who have time.
There are a few common reasons for delayed marriages in the society
Boys want to complete their studies and feel that their spouse may disturb them. Ah! There are so many industrialists, entrepreneurs, sportsmen..... who not only have wives and children but also multiple companies, and events to focus on. Many of them even find time to go around with girl friends, yet they flourish. So how can your wife be an obstacle in your prosperity?
Impractical Expectations : With item girls, fashion models and beauty princess rewriting the definition of good looks, every young men hunts or desires a tall, fair and slim girl. “ My Dream Girl” is the title floating in their minds. On the other hand, the beautiful girl’s parents will settle for men who are rich, own a car, and afford expensive holidays and above all, they must not have many sisters to interfere in the daughters affair. “ after all my daughter is beautifoooool” So the hunt goes on and young men wait for money and the beautiful girl wait for rich men.
Lack of fund for Marriage and Rituals: One of the reasons of the Prophet hood of Muhammed (pbuh) is clearly mentioned in Surah Ar’af ch 7 verse 157:…. He frees them from the yokes bonded on their necks….. Lavish Walima, Expensive gifts to the realtives of bride and groom are the yokes in our necks. Islam has made marriage easy. Walimas are not supposed to be hosted in huge halls and invitations are not a status symbol if you cannot afford them. We have elevated these customs but there were marriages in the Prophet’s time when the sahaba did not invite him in their walimas. !!!!
There can be hundred more reasons I can write and refute them all, but for time being let me free you so that you may think over it yourselves.
Source:http://nisaaryusuf.islamexplored.in/2011/06/delayed-marriages-bitter-fruits-plucked.html
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